Needs some tips on how to make your inner sexy vixen her best? Lisa Cach, author of the sizzling 1,001 Erotic Nights series stopped by XOXOAD to offer some sage advice on how to be your sexiest, most confident self. Read below for some tips and make sure to download her hot, Hot, HOT series … you just might learn a thing or two!

3 Secrets to Releasing Your Inner Siren

Release your inner siren, and you can take down kingdoms. That’s what Nimia learns in the third installment of “1,001 Erotic Nights” as she draws upon every trick of sexual enchantment to become the “Siren of Gaul.” If you want to know the three simple secrets to unleashing your own inner sex goddess, read on.

1) Looks matter.

Not the ones you’re born with; who can do anything about that? But we can all look better than we do when we roll out of bed in the morning. Siren Secret #1 is to make an effort.

Stand up straight, like your grandmother told you to. Move with calm confidence, without apology for the space you take on Earth. Anxious, frantic movements speak of someone frightened, not a woman in charge of herself and her life. A siren is no scuttling mouse.

Emphasize your feminine features, to better trigger masculine attraction. Fortunately, they’ve done studies on these things, so you don’t have to guess. Feminine traits include high contrast between eyes/lips and the face, which is why women instinctually reach for eyeliner and lipstick. A woman’s neck is more delicate than a man’s, so pull enough of your hair back so that it shows, and for heaven’s sake don’t bury your neck in a scarf unless you have plans to seductively remove it while he watches. High heels make your gait more feminine, and long hair signals both health and femininity.

Wear clothes that fit close to the body (nothing baggy or boxy) and emphasize your feminine figure points: bust, waist, hips, and the fact that they’re not arranged like a man’s. Whatever you think your figure flaws are, a guy still wants to see your ass in tight jeans and can’t resist checking out your breasts. If putting on a garment makes you feel that guys will be checking out one too may of your curves, you have a winner.

Red. Yes, it’s true, everyone understands that red means “on the prowl.” Wear red if you want to attract sexual attention, and make women grab possessively for their guys’ arms. It’s as good as putting a sign out.

Making an extra effort on your appearance serves a double purpose. First, and obviously, it makes you look more attractive to the male eye. Second and more important, it shows the world that you think something of yourself. You know you’re worth the time and effort of well-fitting clothes and groomed hair and a bit of mascara to emphasize your glorious eyes. You are a queen, and you dress as such!

As you value yourself, so shall others value you.

2) Love your body.

This is really part of #1, but it’s less tangible. Or more, depending on how you go about it… Ahem.

We’ve read ad nauseum in women’s magazines about the need to love our bodies as they are. There are even soap advertising campaigns directed at it! And yet, how do we do it? It’s like telling someone to “snap out of it,” isn’t it? Talk at it all you want, it doesn’t often seem to happen. Almost the entirety of my previously published novel “Great Aunt Sophia’s Lessons for Bombshells” was, at heart, a lesson on loving your body, and boy does the heroine suffer trying to learn it.

And yet it must happen, if you are to be a siren. You must feel your body is a wonderland of delights, that it’s your sexual playground, that it has joy in abundance to offer both you and any man fortunate enough to touch it. There can be no shame. Look at images of Marilyn Monroe, and you’ll see that her immense appeal was not so much in any specific beauty she had, but in an attitude she projected of being a bowl full of fun. Looking at her, it would never cross your mind that she might have thought her thighs were too big. She looked, instead, like someone who’d gleefully throw off her clothes without a moment’s concern about whether you thought those dimples on her butt were a turn-off.

A siren never asks if a dress makes her butt look big.

So what do you do to achieve this magical frame of mind?

Seek out images of women of all shapes and sizes enjoying their bodies, be it in sport, dance, sex, masturbation, or daily life. Learn that your body is not abnormal, unusual, or less-than.
Visit to really see what women look like, in all their most intimate bits. Yes, I’m talking everything from breasts to labia.

Take a movement-based class like belly dancing, yoga, ballroom dance, tai chi, sword fighting, trapeze arts; whatever sings to you and your body.

And if all else fails, fake it until you make it. Pretending can, with startling swiftness, turn into believing.

3) Channel the Dalai Lama.

Be kind.

This sounds so simple, and it is simple, but it’s also immensely powerful.

The great secret key to charisma, and thus also to turning yourself into an irresistible siren, is to focus positively on others.

This is good news! You don’t need to have interesting things to say or witty comments. What you do need is to focus kindness, warmth, and a cheerful, positive attitude toward everyone in your path. Snarky bitterness is a repellent; superior, critical know-it-all-ness is a turn-off — and yet so many people retreat to it when scared and lacking confidence. We’ve all known that woman with the rapier tongue, and while she astounded us with her incisive perceptions, she also frightened us, and made us put our guard up. We didn’t want to bare our hearts to her.

If you want to be a siren, then make like the sun and exude warmth, so that all may turn to you like plants toward light.

When it comes to men, this means savoring all the reasons that you love them. Men are different from women, and you love that. Don’t you?

Ask men questions about themselves, and listen with genuine interest to their answers. Find their areas of expertise or passion, and get them talking about them. If he feels good about himself while talking to you, he’ll associate you with those good feelings. When the opportunity presents itself, give a sincere compliment. We often think positive thoughts about others, but rarely speak them.

Speak them. This goes a long, long ways with men, especially.

Give him a chance to help you with a problem, whether you need the help or not. This is not about proving your independence — you’ve already done that on your own time, haven’t you? Yes, we all know you can open the freakin’ door yourself — but about a dance of romantic seduction. This is a role. A game. A play. A hunt and pursuit. If you don’t want to play it the siren way, then don’t. But if you do, then understand that letting him know that you see his strengths, and appreciate them, can be powerfully seductive.

You might not believe it, but men are much more afraid of you than you are of them. Be kind.

And those are the three secrets to being a siren. Make an effort with your appearance, love your body, and be kind. Of the three, being kind is the most important. An open attitude toward men will draw them to you like nothing else, so be certain you want the attention you’re going to get if you release your inner siren… Because once you do, men will be swarming you like bees on a wild lilac.

May you make beautiful honey together.