Things were a little slow in Music City last night, I feel…but we did get closure on a couple of things. Rayna and Sketchy Teddy sign their divorce papers, which seems to send both of them off to cut loose a little. With Rayna, that doesn’t bother me much, because her version of “cutting loose” is calling Dirty Liam the Sexy Producer and suggesting they finish the album. After some back and forth, cut to them between the sheets, which means that “finish the album” has just become a naughty metaphor in my lexicon. Rayna also confesses to DLSP that she can’t sing, since her vocal cords were damaged when she was intubated in the hospital. Should we start a betting pool on how many weeks it’ll be before DLSP’s inspiring coaching restores our nightingale to top form? (I say 2.)
Deacon is back on the wagon, going to meetings, and getting a little tough love from He-Who-Would-Be-Mayor, Coleman–Coleman first tells Deacon he’s moving, and so can’t really be his sponsor anymore, and also says, “By the way, stop letting your daddy issues take over your life.” Deacon responds in outraged fashion, but by the end of the show has gone to the doctor for help with his wrist issues and stood up at AA to confess that his father was an abusive drunk who told Deacon he’d grow up to be just like him one day. I confess I found Deacon’s climactic, teary line: “But I would NEVER hurt a child!” less than stirring. Um, yeah, dude, but that’s a pretty low bar to set.
In The Edgehill Diaries, artists are still scrambling for Most Favored Nation status with New Label Guy, who is oiling the waters a little bit with both Rayna and Juliette. First, he apologizes to Juliette for getting off on the wrong foot and asks her to be the headliner at this stockholder up-front thingy. Juliette has cat-who-ate-the-canary face as she tells him, “So sorry, no can do.” The actor playing NLG does a good “seething anger covered with surface courtesy,” I’ll give him that. Juliette smugly says that she’s giving a command performance for Charles and Olivia Wentworth, who just happen to own about a gazillion radio stations, magazines and TV studios. NLG is forced to agree that it’s important for Juliette to keep that date, and sends her on her way. Then he meets with Rayna, who thinks she’s going to shock him with her plans to cut the rest of her album with DLSP. To her surprise, he is thrilled, and encourages her to finish the album quickly to capitalize on her recent popularity. He also invites her to sing for the stockholders (implying she’s his first choice, heh)…she demurs, but can’t let him know that her pipes are on the fritz, so ultimately agrees.
Out at Media Mogul Manor, Juliette and Avery (who’s there as part of the band) are ogling the estate and commiserating about their poor backgrounds. The two of them have a great rapport, and I’m liking them more and more together–and then Juliette messes it up, AGAIN, by saying something thoughtless in an attempt to charm Charles of MMM, who’s hired Juliette to sing for his wife on their 5th anniversary. It’s basically “Oh, he’s not my boyfriend, he’s just the help,” which Avery takes badly. Charles of MMM, however, seems successfully charmed. So charmed, in fact, that after the successful concert (which includes some funny bits of the “people that rich are deluded about their skills, and we must work around them” variety), he catches Juliette in a back hallway of MMM and makes a move. She is briefly shocked, but then drags him into the no doubt palatial bathroom where I assume they will be discovered next week, thus laying Juliette low once again. Girl, get your mind right!
So now, it’s all over but the singing. Oh, there’s a bit of a shopping montage, too–both Will and Scarlett are getting restyled now that they’re commodities. Will, post-styling, looks exactly the same, but has changed his tight t-shirt for an expensive-looking button-down that I feel is less flattering. Scarlett, however, has ditched the country granny look for Grand Ol’ Hussy…she’s in sparkly black stilettos, a red poofy square-dance-ish skirt, and a teeny-tiny black and glitter bustier that I don’t really believe she’d be so willing to wear. I mean, she looks great–very sexy, especially with the red lip they have her in–but it’s completely antithetical to anything we’ve ever, ever seen her in.
Stockholder upfront thingy! We come in just as Flavor of the Month is wrapping up singing whatever, and then it’s time for Will to sing. I forgot to mention that earlier, Will hears Gunnar working on a new song that’s great, and suggests that he sing it that night at the upfronts. Gunnar says thanks, no thanks, he wants to sing it for the first time himself. This is relevant because guess what Will sings now that he’s up on stage? Yes, of course, it’s Gunnar’s song. He does give Gunnar the songwriting credit, and he does a good job with it, but it’s still shady. That Will will do anything to get ahead! Gunnar is not happy.
Now NLG introduces Rayna to the crowd. She takes the stage, and NLG expects to hear her sing, but instead, she gives a little speech about how great it is to be at Edgehill, and how as they know she’s started her own label, and don’t they all want to hear the first terrific artist signed to Highway 65 Records? So Scarlett comes up, and sings something that also doesn’t really sound like her, but is still a good song. The crowd goes wild, but in the wings, NLG is fuming! He mutters dark threats to an underling, of the “she wouldn’t like me when I’m angry” variety. NLG will not be thwarted! But for tonight, Rayna wins again.
See y’all next week!