If you watched last night’s Oscar ceremony, you may have seen John Travolta introducing Broadway superstar Idina Menzel, who was singing “Let It Go” from Frozen. Or at least, that’s what he was supposed to do–but when the time came, he announced that we would be hearing from…Adele Dazeem. Huh?

Whether it was dyslexia, alcohol, or just a terribly timed slip of the tongue, Travolta’s flub became the most hilarious part of the telecast. And thanks to Slate.com, you can find out how he would have introduced YOU! I, for one, would become Abbey Zeemis. (Frankly, that’s closer than some telemarketers have come!) Here are a few of the other Oscar nominees, run through the Travoltatron:

Cate Blanchett becomes… Clarke Brazent

Matthew McConaughey becomes… Michael Mozaleen

and Lupita Nyong’o becomes… Louisa Reynzo

What did your name become?